AluminiumXmasTrees [he/him]
Yeah I don’t have enough contact with them to know if they’ve been forced to do that yet but their attitude towards people who work in service jobs is fucking abhorrent. At my mums 40th, my aunt drank too much and went on a horrible rant about the people working at the restaurant and how “disgusting” she found the wait staff in particular. They have nothing but contempt for anyone who works or doesn’t have as much money as they do. That includes my mother and our family.
So the idea of them being forced to join the workforce and get real 9 to 5 jobs would be fucking amazing. My cousin used to go to fast food joints and Treat the staff like absolute shit with her friends and laugh at them for, you know, doing their jobs. She’s an absolute fucking ghoul but of the dumbest kind.
Well that was intended as an exaggerated joke about how dumb and bougie they are, I didn’t think anyone would take that seriously honestly - but Ffor real - I’m not in line because my mother chose to emancipate herself and specifically asked to be disinherited. She’s no longer part of the line and doesn’t want to be. For the record, I agree with her decision. They are truly horrible people.
My mum’s Dad’s side are very old English rich people. Not “in line for the throne” or “aristocracy” rich but they have a large house, a coat of arms, a horse, fox hunting meetings and so on. They’re obsessed with their historic position as a family and their current position in “society”. I would class them as bougie snobs who aren’t as rich as they want people to think, aren’t as significant as they themselves think (like my cousin legitimately thinks that her last name and their instagram with 2,000 followers makes her “a celebrity” for instance even though no one has ever heard of the family outside of her circles) and who basically spend their entire lives obsessing over things they think make them look a certain way.
If you want Dm me and I’ll send you the coat of arms and other details if you’re curious about it. I’d rather not openly dox myself publicly but I don’t mind sharing it with people. I don’t have a lot to do with them (and never have), they abused my mother and treated my aunt like she was heaven sent.
Yep, exactly what I would say and what I’ve always been told by the bougie side of my family. Thats also why there’s a big market price gap between $400 and $1000+ you always see a jump from around 300 and something to over a grand on nearly every wine list.
Also I’m not kidding about Lidl wines by the way, they’re genuinely fantastic wines with a huge following among the wine community. Worth tracking down if you like wine.
Feels very weird to talk about my moms bougie family and their interests on chapo, even if it is about how fucking stupid and shallow they are.
I didn’t know they applied this to women too. My brother makes fun of me because apparently my index finger makes me more likely to be a homosexual according to this infographic he sent me - https://hexbear.net/pictrs/image/B5EnFLvHH6.jpg
I actually know about wine, despite being from a poor family, because my mom came from a “well to do” English family and one thing I have been taught by every wine person I’ve ever spoken to is that the “stunt priced wines” as they called them, (basically any wine that’s priced above $5,000 and on a restaurant wine menu regularly) is there for people who don’t know anything about wine but they have the money to pretend they do. John Legend and Chrissy Teigan seem definite wine snob poseurs. (Also I’ve never heard of a wine recc that doesn’t make the price of the bottle clear, so I don’t actually believe this story).
Any wines that are actually worth that kind of money you know about because either it’s a limited harvest, or there’s a specific flavour to the grapes that season, or similar reasons. The price is still Goddamn ridiculous but there are usually stupid bougie reasons.
And as proof that this wine stuff is nonsense, my grandfathers wine collection is insured for close to £350k. He has wines he acquired during the second war (I really wonder about who he was buying French wine from during 1942 but that’s beside the point except giving you some idea of my grandfathers moral compass) and wines he inherited from his great grandfather… And the wine he drinks for enjoyment in private is a £15 bottle from Lidl
Anyone wondering, no I am not in line for any inheretence as I am still related to my father who is “common” and thus I am not included in anything with that side of the family. I guess I have dirty genes.
"I’m sorry you people are too poor to relate to my hilarious story where I didn’t notice I was spending thousands of dollars. Excuse me while I now talk down to you all. "
Oh shit I forgot to add this - I’m thinking of making a post about the discord in a day or so when I’m more used to my meds and most importantly I will have my laptop (instead of just a phone and a tablet) to type on, just to see what the interest is and hopefully get something properly organised for the second half of February at the least. I’ll let you know when I make the post and if you have any ideas for it let me know. My current idea is a discord that’s open 24/7 for when people need it, with a weekly or twice weekly group meeting where people make the effort to attend for 30mins - 1hr every week.
Sorry for clogging your thread.
I’m sorry I can’t be of more help, I feel particularly useless just offering the usual “I’m here if you need me” but I genuinely mean it. I’m around pretty much 24/7 currently.
spoiler
I’ve been exactly where you are. My mom had post natal depression and abandoned me, at 19, with my 6 month old sister to look after for 14 months (as her abusive boyfriend refused to do it or have much to do with her/our family). She then let him force me out of the house (he said “him or me” and I was a fucking idiot who thought that after she’d let me get abused for 16 years at the hands of my Stepfather she wouldn’t choose another abusive man over me, she wouldn’t do that to me twice right? Except she fucking did without hesitation) and so I protected her from social services taking the baby away because she was unfit to raise said baby, spent 14 months looking after a baby I was ill prepared for (as I didn’t expect to be on my own with a six month old child at any point) and then in return she made me homeless and let her shitty boyfriend destroy most of my things by leaving them in a “storage shed” with no roof. Then my mom got pregnant again by the prick and again he dissappeared and she got post natal depression. But I’m not there to look after the newborn this time. So she forces my sister to drop out of school and look after the baby AND the other one when she gets home from school. Oh and then she kicks my sister out when herr boyfriend gives her another ultimatum.
Oh and he openly told my mother than his goal was to move her to his small 2 bedroom house in a tiny village in the middle of nowhere (she can’t drive so she’s completely dependent on him as she has no income of her own so she’s reliant on him for that too) and then force out her other children (me, my sister and my brother) and leave just him, his two children and my mum. He bragged about it to me and my sister, his shitty friends and so on. And he’s literally done it. He’s got exactly what he wanted. I lost basically everything I owned pre-2018 apart from what I could fit into an army surplus messenger bag and some of that I had to trade with people I met whilst homeless to get them to leave me alone. Thank God my dad found space for me once he realised I was sleeping on a piss stained mattress in a squat in Stoke on Trent. I mean my dad literally moved from his home of thirty plus years and lost a large chunk of money in benefits to find space for me. And he helped me get healthy after I caught pneumonia in said squat, then a lung infection on top of it and needed insane anti biotics. My mom on the other hand couldn’t even take my side when he attempted to throw me out and literally tried to start a fight with me on the night his first child was born. She pretended she didn’t see when he bounced my head off the radiator and knocked a tooth loose and despite witnessing him doing it, she then said it didn’t happen and she didn’t even speak to him about it. She couldn’t do the bare fucking minimum and provide me with a bed, even after I cooked for everyone for 14 months on top of raising a god damn fucking child.
And now I’m in a hospital bed with a very real chance of being put into a medical coma if my condition gets worse and my operation in March isn’t exactly without risk (it’s been described to me as “70:30”) and my mom hasn’t made any effort to contact me since I called her after my diagnosis to tell her I was really sick and scared and she ended the call early because “he” told her to. Because apparently even when crying on a payphone in a hospital entrance lobby, I don’t warrant my mother’s affection or even her fucking attention if he says it’s not OK.
Sorry I’m fucking rambling, I’ve put it behind a spoiler section so I don’t take up the whole thread talking about myself - it’s because I’m on insane fucking pain meds that make me over share and never shut the hell up when they kick in. I’m trying to say that I genuinely relate strongly to your situation like, I know how it feels to watch what little you thought you had just slide out of view, and having absolutely no control over anything as the tension increases all around you. I genuinely mean that I’m here if you need anything at all.
Do you want me to find you the link to the anarchist bed network in case you need to get away from your parents for a few days? They have beds all over America and Europe and when I was homeless it was literally my best friend. I can definitely find the current link for you, if you think you might need it. Let me know.
I’m sorry this is all over the place, it’s because of my medication (it’s why I’ve been avoiding commenting on here and have just been lurking), just if there’s anything at all you need, or anything I can do or anything you might need help or advice with - do not hesitate to contact me. I’ve been where you are and I know how awful it is.
Hey, I’ve been in a similar pit of poverty and despair and while my situation has kind of improved, I’m still too poor to do anything (and currently too sick) and I really strongly related to pretty much all of this. I know how it feels to wonder what comes next when the other shoe finally drops. The weird tension that gets to the point where you want the next awful thing to just hurry the fuck up and happen already because you’re sick of the fever pitch in your brain.
I really don’t know how to help but I never realised anyone else on here would have similar issues to me. Please hit me up if you need anything. I’ve spent a lot of time in my life in psych wards and grippy socks jail.
Honestly I really want to start a weekly discord psych group session with other members for people with problems that aren’t going to go away after a couple of posts.
