Isn’t the entire point of the profile and matching system to filter incompatible people out? Why can I match with 50 people and not a single one wants to get a coffee or something after exchanging a few pleasantries? Everybody hates these things and yet they refuse to do anything IRL to get off them. Is there some Manchurian candidate activation codeword that I’m missing? I feel like everyone treats this shit solely as an ego booster and actually gets pissed off that anyone tries to interact with them. How do you meet people in hellworld if you don’t drink?
Me after dozens of dead-end back-and-forths that lead to nowhere despite having shared interests and presumably being attracted to each other since we matched:
Hmm, maybe it’s the extreme commodification of relationships and atomization under capitalism that prevents you from getting anywhere with this garbage
Nope, must be because @SuperZutsuki@hexbear.net didn’t say my favorite “The Office” quote and send me a playlist with 50 of the greatest songs I’ve never heard that made me instantly fall in love with them. I have no idea what other people expect from these things but I’m not doing labor for someone that I don’t even know is real. Thanks for reading my rant, any advice is appreciated.
No, they deliberately get in the way of you matching with the most compatible people unless you pay for “premium” features that used to be core functionality
I’m just a few weeks into this hell and probably going to be done with it soon. I need to find some events to go to that aren’t centered on drinking. Then I just have to wrangle with my crippling social anxiety.
If only we had places where people could commune with each other without paying money
Just going to walk around the library in a book costume asking people if they want to check me out
It’s a miserable experience. After years of trying I only ever managed to meet up with one person I thought I had in-person chemistry with. At the end of the date she gave me her number unprompted. Then she unmatched me and I never saw or heard from her again
I’ll be frank as a person that has been on dating websites before they were apps… people often go on them for small validation and then realize they have no time to meet others when they have to prep for work. It’s gotten worse after covid lockdowns.
I’m on Grindr and Feeld mostly and Hinge sometimes. I’m mostly looking for casual sex buddies and not relationships.
I’m not gonna say the “it’s not you it’s me” line nor its inverse. Because the honest answer is: it’s not us, it’s capitalism.
I’ve had to cancel so many times on people because I sometimes get home too tired to move after work. And have had people cancel as well. Nobody admits that fatigue but it’s understood.
And keep in mind I’m queer, bi, relatively attractive and literally looking to hand out blowjobs. Sometimes people are too tired to even get their dicks sucked
So don’t think you’re doing things completely wrong. The hellscape makes it hard to meet new people.
Dating apps don’t want people to form relationships for the same reason pharmaceutical companies don’t want to cure diseases. They just want a temporary, hopefully addictive, treatment for loneliness not a remedy
