Treat Defender:
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“Let people enjoy things”
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Just wants to shut brain off and relax
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Shit taste
Treat Assassin:
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Powerful crit(icism)s
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Appears out of nowhere and identifies flaws and weaknesses you never would’ve noticed but now can never ignore again
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Mysteriously fades into shadows when their own treats come under attack
Treat Mage:
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Nuanced, insightful analysis, can find positive/negative aspects in just about anything
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Flexible offensive and defensive options
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Susceptible to bullying, avoids direct confrontation
Treat Paladin:
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Likes good things
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Doesn’t like bad things
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Simple as
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Nobody wants to hang with them because they feel threatened by their moral superiority and obviously correct takes
Treat Cleric:
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Long list of rules for not engaging with things that others find frustrating and arbitrary
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Has one specific domain of treat they enjoy
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Wouldn’t watch a Miyazaki movie because it’s anime
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Somehow keeps being right about stuff
Treat Warlock:
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“So bad it’s good,” cult classics
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Will happily explain how their favorite treat is problematic in ways you never would’ve considered
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Lack of practical effects their third biggest issue with capitalism
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Nobody told them irony is dead
TYS, add your own
I’m a treat berserker - I consume them uncontrollably and then become disproportionately angry with myself about it
Necromancer: i will never stop restarting the Tolkein struggle session :sicko-pig:
treat necromancer could also be like someone obsessed with penny dreadfuls or 1920s pulp magazines but in an even weirder non-ironic way
“yo, you have gotta watch my favorite movie. It’s from 1913, it’s called The Lovely Horse Gallop.”
Treat Monk:
- Only consumes obscure and esoteric media.
- Sounds cool in principle, but ends up with utterly insufferable takes on just about everything.
- Brings up completely random comparisons which almost work, but not quite.
- Never wins an argument. Just keeps going until everyone else gets bored and leaves.
Oh man I just remembered that white buddhist Monk guy that joined the chapo discord and got totally shit on for being a weird chauvinist who moved to Myanmar and didn’t even bother to learn the language.
I wanna be a treat bard
- loudly sing the praises of my favorite treat, even if it’s something popular
- get people excited to share the love of my treat
- pretends my treat is more intellectual/refined/tasteful than it actually is
- annoying/useless
Those are known already as “influencers,” especially when peddling RAID Shadow Legends.
Treat Orc:
- Is happy eating slop
- Doesn’t care about anything or anyone’s treat so long as I have my own
- Will fight you if you try to talk trash about my slop
- Expensive treats are gross to me, can’t understand them
