Why are some queer people like this? I was in a lesbian bar, dancing with my girlfriend, and a gay cis man (non-white) grabbed my ass and said, “girl, you can really work that ass”. I wasn’t seeing red like I would have if he had been straight, but it was still creepy as hell.
I think various groups of people normalise it among themselves and then end up doing it with anyone while in venues they’re regulars at, then it becomes normalised at the venue and anyone coming into that environment ends up a confused and feeling slightly violated victim of it… Until they normalise it themselves too if they end up being regular there. Speaking from experience myself too.