newusername [she/her]

There’s a mixture really, but I chose the final quote specifically because it was one of the main comments I saw that addressed kink as a spectrum of behaviors/appearance and not just as a singular thing. But that is one of the major problems with “kink at pride” discourse, there’s not really any specification of what that means so for some it’s as simple as a dude wearing leather or someone being shirtless and for others it’s to the extreme of wearing leashes and flashing your genitals both under this same word all dependant on who is saying it.

I mean the idea is just public areas that people (who aren’t you and that you didn’t have prior contact or forms of communication with) are in.

Basically as you start hurting other queer people, you need to rein your behavior in. Small things like collars or saying “sir” are fine, but more elaborate displays violate consent and hurt others. As a followup as well, there was an interesting example someone gave of how even some of the kink spaces they participated in didn’t allow active play in the social areas since the level of consent (and what the consent was towards) is unclear, and that even some of the more kinky folk need a space they can retreat to. https://www.reddit.com/r/BDSMcommunity/comments/79htlt/at_what_point_do_you_consider_public_displays_of/dp25jnm/

No I think it’s clearly a bit different, music with gay themes has specific meaning to the queer community that it does not for cishet people. If this was a celebration of particular LGBTQ+ celebrities who were into kink or something that they created with an inherent meaning directly relevant to queer people, this would be different. Most kink expression is not that way, it is quite literally “Some gay people were into BDSM” for the majority of the argument which means nothing to me.

People being into BDSM is different than “We used it as a way to express ourselves”, we know that it’s not integral to queer history the way that LGBT focused music and history like Stonewall is due to the fact that cishet people can enter into the conversation of BDSM and kink without a single thing not applying to them the same. That can not be said of the Stonewall riots, or music that talks about dating other men or whatever else.