The rent is too damn high, can’t have shit in California
They’re gonna bury me with my badge
Anytime I find myself vibing with someone my brain likes to ping me with “But you don’t have your shit together.”
thats stupid, no one has their shit together and there’s not a checklist of shit you need to check off to be ready for a relationship and/or having sex
also “having your own place” being on that list is american suburban hellscape brained af, having roommates is actually good and efficient (or at least it should be)
there’s not a checklist of shit you need to check off to be ready for a relationship and/or having sex
There kind of is. There is such a thing as being unhealthy enough that you shouldn’t be fishing for that sort of thing.
thats stupid, no one has their shit together and there’s not a checklist of shit you need to check off to be ready for a relationship and/or having sex
The problem with this is if you don’t have your shit together people will just skip you and get with someone who does. If you’re choosing between two people and only one has a place, why wouldn’t you just choose them? This wouldn’t be that much of a problem if we still had third spaces where things like personality mattered. Since dating apps are heavily skewed towards one gender/position, those in the minority have tons of choice.
You don’t need all of this to hookup or get a relationship, but you do need to convince someone that you’re better than the people who do have it together.
I guess I’m presupposing that you might have other qualities that are attractive or that your partner of choice isn’t incredibly shallow (the latter might be asking too much i guess).
Also this is all neoliberal “everything is a market” internalized bullshit. You are not in competition with every other guy/gal on the planet when it comes to love. It’s about two (or more) people finding each other (which the lack of third places has of course made more and more difficult, but the apps aren’t helping anyone)
I don’t even need to have my shit together necessarily I just need a place where I can fuck
I wasn’t super surprised when I woke up and they had unmatched me, and I am starting to at least see some consistences in my attractive qualities and getting closer to figuring out my type (short, plump, with curly hair or short hair or short curly hair)
If you’re just trying to smash, then get a cheap hotel/ airbnb or something. Anyone that wants to actually date you and is worth your time, won’t care if you have roommates. You might not get laid straight out the gate, but that’s not really the entire point of dating for those seeking a relationship. At least that’s my take anyway, speaking as a heterosexual lady.
No joke just fuck them in some secluded place in public if you’re both into that
Rent a hotel room for a night
“Can u host?”
"No travel only
Can u?"
“No sorry.”
Are there any cheap hotels/motels near you? Might be the nuclear option and would definitely give off enormous “I’m cheating on my wife” vibes but it would do
